Feeling kind of tired. Honestly, I'm feeling burned out. I'm balancing quite a load, Between, homeschooling, therapy, and my creative ventures. I'm definitely feeling like I'm dragging the last few days. Part of me is telling me I'm not doing enough, but the other part of me is looking at what I have done, because I have been racking it. And I'm kind of shocked at my productivity. Isn't it funny how our mind can lie to us? Or how the pressures from the external world can trick us into thinking we aren't doing enough?
Currently all of what I've been doing lately has been done mostly on my phone. All of my drafts for my blogs or my patterns are done through Google docs, posting on here, Ravelry and Deviantart, etc... It's not exactly ideal. I know this. It's eating into my hands in a way I dislike. It's even less ergonomic that typing at a computer. I've found myself using text to speech but that backfired. I dislike it because it usually needs to be cleaned up badly. It's not good with accents.
We are having to really seriously analyze our tech in the house right now because Windows functionality has gotten so bad with its constant crashing and updates bricking the computer and its usability, that we have been in the middle of backing up our stuff sorting it out, and we are wiping, reloading, and uploading Linux onto our computer. So with that in my cards causing more to pile up on my load unnecessarily... and before I can start doing digital art again.
There is a large learning curve. I've used it before back in Constantine... but that feels so long ago and I don't really remember much outside of GIMP and drawing on it. I got to find out how to make my programs compatible. Gaming to my surprise nowadays is compatible which makes me feel better because that was a major reason for switching and finally making the leap away from windows. Our son just couldn't even play games. Whatever AI windows junk they stuck on 11, bogs the computer down so badly, its worse that yesteryears bloat ware.
It looks like my tablet's compatible, while CSP is compatible, I have to do some tweaking and get some stuff set up so its a little bit on the back burner not too badly but it is. And it sucks...
For the time being I'll be doing traditional art to try and stay up on stuff but I can't promise my traditional art looks good. I feel like I made huge milestone leaps and bounds with my digital art comparatively to my traditional. And honestly it feels like the skill levels are completely different. Asynchronous. And I think that's due to the fact that I can sit there and control z over, and over, and over again until I have something where I want it. Until that something is right.
My last painting taught me that I can paint over mistakes until I get it right, but I don't work in acrylics or oils. My traditional art consists of pencil, colored pencils, and watercolor or inks. Some of which are more unforgiving mediums. I can't do that whole control z on paper. I give myself the three erase rule because I don't want to ruin the grain of the paper or destroy it so that I can't draw on it properly. This came from a habit of being poor and using copy paper. And you can wreck copy paper grain. Copy paper is far more forgiving and cheaper than art papers, that my budget doesn't allow me to just waste paper like I would like to in order to learn. There's massive guilt and fear of lack there. Learned behaviors from poverty. Things like not being able to obtain things or scarcity mindsets. So it's kind of one of those if I make a mistake I have to keep it after a while and move on with the piece and keep learning. Keep practicing...
I've got to go source a couple of parts for the laptop too. My friends might have something I can trade skills for.
Um... If anyone is willing too I'm still waiting to get ahold of some wood beads and plastic canvas. I've been trying to talk around and see if anyone has any they don't want or aren't going to use. Recycle and reuse first mindset. But this isn't like fabric where I can ask for scraps. It's a bit more specific.
I’m posting my wishlist, its a Waldorf Doll and other toys or patterns projects list. I would like to make some dolls, and sew, knit, and crochet for them and create patterns I can share. My list has yarn, fabrics, notions, tools, and a bunch of other stuff for my multi media art projects.
Some of the patterns I’m releasing soon will be connected to the dolls, little toys. It doesn’t have to be from Amazon specifically. I’m currently looking for multiple size wood beads for joints (the package has the sizes I need, everything locally is too small or divided up between 3 packages) and a few sheets of plastic canvas, doll skin in blush, inner head tubing in size 2 1/4", wool batting, and like $40 in felt but that’s not on my list because I’m looking for certain colors and I can only get it from my favorite supplier, especially heathers...
There's like 4 projects there, plastic canvas if for a crochet and felt pattern technically two projects, same idea, just two separate outcomes. Options for different crafters. The wood beads will help me experiment with doll jointing as I tweak some sizing options. And of course I would like to get started on a doll base soon. Because If I have my doll base for the size I want. I can better draft patterns for it. The felt is for a Christmas ornament project that I hope to share in the future and I want to get a jump on soon because I have a lot of embroidery I need to do.
If anyone is willing to support a human artist. My Amazon wishlist is here: https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/3KO0HZTVUG366?ref_=wl_share
Smaller projects seem easier for me to tackle unlike cosplay back in the day, and I feel like I can actually contribute something back to the arts. I have a huge list of stuff but I don't want to spoiler it. I have tried to break everything down into manageable and doable bits. We're in it for a long haul.
Support Me! Page here: https://artofladyseshiiria.blogspot.com/p/support-me.html
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